I Will Walk Like a Crazy Horse

Do you like Concept movies? Symbolism for symbolism's sake? A dwarf dressed in women's underwear? Homoerotic tension between civilization and nature? Pretentious scat films? Skeletons? Then what are you waiting for, rush out and see this!

Aden Rey, oedipal epileptic, has run off to the desert after the death of his mother, turning his back on civilization and the image-conscious upper-crust society he was raised into. He soon encounters a preternatural runt of a man (too tall and properly-proportioned to be a dwarf, yet abnormally short) eating sand. This is Marvel, tens of thousands of years old yet entirely innocent of the ways of humans. He feeds Aden some goat-turd pie, and we're off!

Marvel is the yin to Aden's yang, the nature to his nurture, the Abbott to his Costello. Naturally Aden, quite taken with Marvel (who apparently reminds him of his childhood), decides the best thing to do is to introduce him to society by taking him to the big city to meet chicks. A series of what should be slapstick gags ensues where Marvel predictably fails to interact with society properly. It's all fun and games until someone loses a prostitute, then suddenly the two are on the lamb and the film transitions into some kinds of Jesus-buddy-road-movie. Well maybe not so much 'buddy' as 'unconsummated same-sex love interest'.

There is no point in calling this film "pretentious"; that would be like calling Plan 9 From Outer Space "bad". All of the usual targets are painstakingly set up for abuse: society, politicians, businessmen, the Church, meat-eating, deforestation, consumerism, television, luxury living, landlords, responsible adults, etc. There was a rather unexpected strike at circuses, probably an attempt at a scathing indictment of greed and spectacle. The film is chock full of the kind of mysticism, healing, sex, skeletons, sex with skeletons (well, close enough), dream sequences, cross-dressing, excrement (all flavors), toenail clippings, cannibalism, crucifixes, genitals, goats, goats' genitals (just kidding, the film doesn't go *that* far), trigger-happy cops, and pompous windbags given comeuppance that one expects from the early 70s surrealist films.

* * * R A T I N G * * *
I Will Walk Like a Crazy Horse (IMDB)

Wince : [***__]
Flinch : [***__]
Retch : [***__]
Gape : [****_]

Beerequisite : [*****]
Pornability : [****_]
Obscurity : [****_]
Explicability : [*____]

Did you know...
... the Virgin Mary was a redhead?
... happiness is a naked boy shot by a firing squad of old ladies?
... dwarf urine and mud can heal all wounds?
... Jesus is Money?

"I didn't need to see that!":
* Genital torture makes baby Jesus cry.
* Male bonding via back-to-back crapping.
* That cleaver is uncomfortably close to those genitals
* So uh, yeh, that's a transexual right.
* Did he really need to put on his mother's lingerie? OK, maybe, but did the *other* guy?

Never seen *that* before:
* Not tongue-tied, but tongue-nailed.
* Was that a phallic candle or a candled phallus?
* Gas masks instead of bondage hoods, hmm...
* Beaten by blind men!