Blood Diner

Two brothers open a vegetarian diner (well, it serves vegetarians, often to other vegetarians) after exhuming their sorcerer/serial-killer father and transplanting his still-living eyes and brain into a jar in order to guide them in their virgin-mutilating (and sewing back together) quest to reincarnate the five-million-year-old goddess Shitar.

Quite a mouthful, eh? And I didn't even mention the zombie-rock concert finale!

This film truly has everything. A must-see, and see-again.

* * * R A T I N G * * *

Blood Diner (IMDB)

Wince : [***__]
Flinch : [***__]
Retch : [***__]
Gape : [****_]

Beerequisite : [****_]
Pornability : [**___]
Obscurity : [****_]
Explicability : [**___]

Reality Check: Wait, the human race is HOW old again?

Character Most Likely to be Reborn as a WWF Star: Little Jimmy Hitler

Things I've Never Seen Before: Did he just cut off his own penis and threaten to use it as a weapon?

Other Notable Moments:
* Ouch! Killed by a deep fryer in the most horrible head-battered fashion!
* Who is manning that ventriloquist dummy?
* Topless Aerobics! Yay!
* Another Hitler?
* It's the build-your-own-cheerleader store!
* "The killer was last seen with a knife in one hand, and his genitals in the other."